Its 3 am in the morning and my new best friend – insomnia, is listening to me go on and on about life, my current state and of how things are with me. The only other person that truly knows what’s going on with me, and the Almighty God.
So many questions about my life and future. Plans to make, dreams to envision and a reality to achieve. Insomnia knows about them all, knows my fears and late night thoughts. My feelings that have been bottled up during the day, my struggles that I’ve yet to overcome, Insomnia knows them all.
Not like I look forward to our meetings, in fact, I detest it. But then again, I am glad that you are always there for me when I need you. Even though you know how much I hate you, you still listen to me ramble on about any and everything that keeps me up at night.
You take more from me than just my secrets and thoughts. My mind and body are now weaker than before. But then again, you help me through my sleepless nights due to the failures of the day.
The thought of having to meet you again pushes me to succeed even more. So, maybe, I actually do need you. Maybe even though you keep taking from me, in the end, you actually do complete me.
I just wish you could talk back, I just wish that you could do more than staying mute and listen to me talk. Do more than listening to my mind think and think of so many things that my mouth and nature are too weak to voice out, or in some cases, vent.
It’s 10 past 3 AM now. The voices in my head, which is the insane way of saying, ‘my mind is thinking of so many things at once that even I can’t keep up with,’ are having a field day this early morning. As little pieces of some thoughts from my mind register in my brain and my body reacts to them. Anger, frustration, rage, a chuckle and then a laugh… it always ends with a laugh. ‘The thin line between sanity and insanity huh.’
It’s time to block out the voices now. And I really am fagged out from talking to you already, though sleep still eludes me. But thank you, really, for listening to me again.
*wears headset and presses play*